My first experience with EMDR as a client was terrible. Straight up not a good time. The therapist told me she'd just completed the first part of the training (there are typically two) and wanted to try it with me. She handed me "tappers" (two small plastic paddles that vibrate alternately right and left) and asked me to envision a traumatic experience I had had shared with her.
All I saw was black.
I was anxious.
The traumatic memory was all the more present.
So, I didn't come back. And I figured EMDR didn't work for me and probably didn't really work in general.
What I know now is that I wasn't properly prepared for the reprocessing part of EMDR (the part that includes dual attention, bilateral stimulation). We hadn't done any foundational resourcing and I'd only seen her a few times. We didn't have much rapport. I wasn't sure what to expect.
The initial preparation stages of EMDR are vital to feeling a greater sense of ease and relief in the reprocessing stage.
Sometimes discomfort is part of the process, even with adequate resourcing. Growth is uncomfortable. Parts of us will hesitate to change; it feels scary to parts of us.
That's where adequate attunement of your therapist to you (being fully present, observant, actively guiding the process for example) is key. That's where we see that although EMDR is structured with protocols, in application the therapy requires an individualized dynamic approach. In this way all of you is seen and welcomed out of the hiding spaces.